Through A Child's Eyes

I think a lot of parents wonder about how they will be remembered by their children. I had a moment today that gave me some hope. At the start of church I helped with the passing of the sacrament which took me away from my family for the first part of the meeting. As I was standing there at the sacrament table fulfilling my duties as a holder of the Lord's priesthood I stole a glance across the chapel and my eyes met Bailey's. She was standing on the pew looking right at me. I was so grateful to be there for my daughter to see. To let her know that her dad loves her and that he also loves the Lord. I hope that these moments will help to instill in her the values that are so important to us, I further hope that the future will bring many more such moments for her to reflect upon.

More ATV Fun

It's time I came clean on something...I am not a very good husband. I want to take my wife out on dates, I want to be romantic, but I find myself wanting in the area of creativity. Well, last Friday I finally had a good idea, and thanks to the Penrod's I was able to bring it to fruition. Jenn and I borrowed our neighbors ATV (and truck) to hit the trails behind Caughlin Ranch for a good old fashioned picnic.



Although we had a little trepidation about leaving Bailey, she cries whenever we try to leave her anywhere, we finally worked up the gumption to go. The weather was perfect with clear blue skies and a nice cool breeze. Jenn was every bit as thrilled as I had hoped. She enjoyed riding and watching the trees whisk by and capturing some really stunning views of the mountains and of Reno. Once she got behind the wheel though she was bound and determined to put the fear of Jenn into me and I am proud to say she was successful.

The picnic itself was at an idyllic spot I have dubbed Tyson's Meadow. It is so peaceful there, the only sounds are the wind and the birds. It feels so great to be that secluded from the worries of the world. The only drawback to the trip at all is that now I have to find some way to buy our own ATV, I am so hooked.

Movie Review -Life is Beautiful

Last night Jennifer and I watched the Italian film "Life is Beautiful" and I have to say,we loved it. It is the story of a Jewish man in Italy under the fascist regime. We follow him as he settles in to a new town, falls in love and starts a family. All of this is to set up for the main conflict of the movie which occurs as he and his family are taken to a concentration camp. Although the introductory portion of the movie went on for a long time it really got you invested in the characters. I am amazed at the horrible things that ordinary people were forced to endure. I cannot imagine what it would take to have that level of character, and I sincerely hope I am never tested to see if I am found possessed with it. While the story is fictional it did a great job of handling the subject matter. It was a beautiful and absolutely heart wrenching movie. Definitely a good one to have a box of tissues on hand. We highly recommend checking this one out.

Super Cute Girl

So Bailey did something cute today that I just have to share really quickly. She was wandering around with her sippy cup when she found a washrag on the floor (don't judge, it's oddly difficult to make it to the laundry basket at times, especially with a one year old screaming her head off). Well she took the rag and began cleaning up imaginary spills on the carpet. In the process of doing this she spilled some of her milk which she then promptly wiped up. It became a game and we had to intervene when she began to deliberately spill just to have something to wipe up. We are amazed almost daily at the actions that we perform that we then see her mimic. She is just growing by leaps and bounds. I think that tomorrow I will teach her how to drive.

Farmer's Market

Tonight our family finally made it to The Farmer's Market in Sparks. We had an incredible time. The atmosphere was really lively and friendly. There was such a diversity of people there and the fruit stands were great. So many samples too, even if you don't plan on buying anything it is worth it just for the tastes. There were peaches and cherries so sweet they make you never want to eat candy again. There were a lot of food vendors too. We opted for a chicken teryaki skewer that had so much meat it fed the three of us, for only $5! Bailey hasn't eaten a lot of meat before but she inhaled this chicken. We bought a pound of cherries and let me tell you Bailey could not get enough.

We also saw a group of mounted police officers, one of which was on a Clydesdale. You don't realize just how big these horses are until you see them with others. The Clydesdale made the other officers horses look like ponies. The rider was also showing off a little, he had the horse dancing for the amusement of the crowd. Bailey loved the horses, she just had a grin that went from ear to ear.

In the end it was a great evening and well worth the trip and the crowds, we give the Sparks Hometown Farmers market a hearty six Sadler thumbs up.

I LOVE MUD!

So I had a blast on Friday June 16th. My friend Tyson has been trying to get together with me for months now so we could just go out and be guys for a day, well we finally got our chance thanks to our amazingly understanding wives. Jenn had to get a babysitter so that she could go to work while I played and Tyson's wife was in the hospital following the birth of their third child just the day before, again our wives our amazing.

We decided to take Tyson's ATV out to the hills behind Caughlin Ranch and to just see where the day took us. Well it seemed that every time we switched as driver we only got more and more adventurous. Tyson found a grove of dead trees that had the nasty tendancy of getting caught up on the roll cage only to suddenly snap back and whip you in your arm or face, or whatever was exposed. We just rode deeper and deeper into the mountains and watched as Reno got farther and farther away. I attempted to take pictures to show the type of terrain that we were traversing but they just didn't do it justice.

Once when I was going up a particularly steep stretch of trail I got a moments scare when the drivers side tires got popped off the ground. I wasn't as concerned with the ATV tipping onto its side as I was all of the inevitable rolling down the hill backwards that would mostly likely follow. After a few seconds that seemed to last hours gravity finally reaserted itself and the two tires found their way back to the ground.




By far my favorite story is a stretch of muddy water that I happened upon. The ATV lacked any type of front windshield so getting soaked was inevitable, but I couldn't resist. I charged at the puddle as fast as I could go. Huge rooster tails shot up on either side of us and a wall of water rose up before us, to our surprise however it did not come through the windshield, the mystery was solved after the ATV bogged down a bit and slowed down. It felt like all that water just hovered directly over our heads just waiting for it's chance to strike, and strike it did. It fell all at once directly onto our heads by the gallon and we were soaked. If you look at the first picture you can make out the small dry spot from where Tyson was sitting. You will have to excuse my stupid grin but I could not stop laughing, it was awesome. Then later through a series of loops that we rode on we came across the same puddle and I just had to go again. The effect was no less dramatic. I could have stayed out there all day long and I was ready to come back and do it again the next day and the day after that and the day after that. It was like a drug.

Thanks again to Jenn and Miranda and their longsuffering towards us. It had been a long time since I was able to just get out and have a good time. Thank you Tyson for the invite.

The Green Eyed Monster

So on June 9th we babysat for some friends of our that just had a baby. It was a chance for them to go out to dinner and enjoy some well deserved time together. Well, we discovered an interesting new side to Bailey's personality, jealousy. Whenever Jennifer was holding Abigail, Bailey would freak out and demand that Jennifer hold her. At this point Jenn handed the baby off to me. No sooner did the infant touch my fingertips than Bailey completely forgot about her mother and demanded that I hold her. She did not like seeing us with another baby. Far from being concerned we found the whole thing hilarious, she is such a little drama queen sometimes.

Count Your Blessings

It is amazing how taking a look into the life of someone else can make you appreciate the things that you have. Today at work I was fitting a gentleman for a suit, he had told me it was for a funeral and then proceeded to ask me about proper etiquette as far as choosing a color, did it have to be black, etc. I told him that it really depended upon his relationship to the deceased and their personal tastes. It was then that I learned that the funeral was for his wife. He could not have been older than his early forties, far too young to have to go through with this and yet there he was. Immediately upon finishing up I called Jennifer to tell her how very much I love her. I am so grateful to have her and Bailey in my life.

Life it turns out is a fragile thing, knowing this helps me appreciate that much more the time that I have now with these two special ladies in my life.

To post or not to post.

I have been debating about whether or not to post on the following. I guess I am really not sure how I want to use this blog. I'm not much for getting preachy or overly political, I've mostly just wanted to reach out to the friends that we have made over the years and keep them up to date with a few quirky stories and some fun pictures. As I think about it now I do realize that I want for this to be something more, I would like for this to be a family history, abbreviated granted but a family history nonetheless. For that purpose I feel that I must share tradgedies to go along with the triumphs so it is in that vein that I offer the following.

It was in the first part of April that Jennifer and I experienced, what was for us, a miracle. We both received the strongest impression that Jennifer was pregnant. For those of you unfamiliar in our nearly eight years of marriage we have only ever managed to get pregnant on one other occasion which ended after only a few weeks in a miscarriage. We have tried throughout the years even retaining a fertility doctor for help but after month after month of disappointment we had simply given up. Try to imagine then our surprise upon our both feeling convinced that at long last we were finally pregnant. At this point it was only intuition but it felt so right. Immediately we tried to watch Jenn's diet and her activity. We were being very careful after our first experience, but despite our best efforts we felt hope, something we had tried very hard not to feel.

After a week or so of this I came home late from work one night and Jenn insisted that there was something that I had to see. She led me upstairs and into the bathroom and simply pointed at the counter. I was confused at first, looking this way and that for what I was supposed to notice until finally my eyes rested upon the pregnancy test sitting upon the counter. There were two lines as blue as could be, I reached for the instructions wanting to be sure I understood the significance of those two little lines but once my eyes finally met Jennifer's she simply nodded her head. I felt such a wave of exultation at that moment, I lifted Jenn in my arms and beamed at my beautiful wife. Somehow I just knew that this time everything would be alright.

Still trying to suppress our excitement we confided our good news with close family. Jennifer went to the doctor for a redundant test which confirmed our earlier results. Her doctor ordered ultrasounds and some blood work to be done just to be sure. The ultrasound allowed for us to see the embryonic sac and Jenn's blood work revealed her hormone levels were not only good but even slightly high. Everything only worked to confirm what we already knew, we were going to have another baby (Bailey counts, say otherwise and I will fight you).

As more and more good news came in our good news chain got longer and longer as we allowed more people into our confidence. I appointed myself as Jennifer's nutritionist and tried to cram food down her at every available opportunity. When I would come home from work I would quiz her about what she had eaten, how long ago it had been and how much she had actually consumed, I would then try to plan a meal that would supply whatever nutrients I felt she was in need of. These weeks could best be described as a sort of giddy delirium for me, but it was not to last.

On Friday May fifteenth I was up early with Bailey and decided to get the grocery shopping done. I left for the store while Jenn was still in bed. Upon arriving home the phone was ringing, it was a nurse from Jenn's obstetrician's office, she informed me that Tuesday was the earliest that the OB could see her and that she should go to the emergency room immediately so they could follow up on the bleeding. My heart sank. I ran upstairs to see Jenn bawling, I hugged her and relayed the message barely holding back tears of my own.

It was a somber drive to the hospital. Our doctor was great, he gave us some hope telling us that it is not that uncommon to bleed in the first trimester but that they would conduct some tests to be sure, an ultrasound and a pelvic exam were ordered and we waited. I called Jenn's mom to help with Bailey and as soon as she answered I just could not hold it together anymore. I could barely get a word out but she quickly understood the gravity of the situation, she came straightway and took Bailey. I should add that Bailey was perfect throughout all of this, she was absolutely charming and adorable our whole time at the hospital. She was a much needed angel in what was a very difficult time.

Once we were wheeled into the ultrasound room the true gravity of the situation hit us. Although the ultrasound tech was not allowed to discuss our results they were written all over his face. Things did not look good. Later in the room Jenn asked if I saw the heartbeat and when I replied that I hadn't we knew that it was a lost cause. We went through the rest of the formalities of the hospital but finally they confirmed our suspicions, the baby was lost, another miscarriage.

Please, understand that we are doing fine, not great but fine. I am amazed at the faith of my sweet wife as she has borne her afflictions with a smile, humbly accepting the Lord's will. I have not done as well. I get choked up, whenever I see someone who is pregnant, I cannot understand why we can't be. I am so confused because I just knew this time that everything would be fine, that everything would work out but I do not understand how. To express a cliche, it's not fair.

I love my daughter with all my heart, she is the light of my life and the apple of my eye, whatever that means. I just had always imagined that there would be more than one, that Bailey would have brothers and sisters, and yes, I know there is still time but try to understand just how much I want to hold those children in my arms now, I want to meet them and know their names I want to be their dad, now.

We have not given up either, as soon as we get the reimbursement from Bailey's adoption we hope to start the process again. We hope to bring another child into our home and then another and maybe another, but until that time I will be the best husband and father that I know how to be, I love you Jenn and I love you Bailey.