Because You Asked

In talking to a number of our friends and loved ones I have discovered that the adoption process is somewhat of a mystery. I would like to try and explain what we are going through in order to offer some perspective. This is not meant to garner sympathy it is intended to be informative so please try not to read to much into it. Also, our experiences are with LDS Family Services, agencies will differ in their methods and procedures.

Once we decided that we wished to adopt again we needed to initiate the process by paying a small deposit and getting interviewed by a social worker. From there we needed to complete several background checks. We had to be fingerprinted and checked by both the state and federal government (the FBI takes forever to get this done so if you are considering adopting I would do this first of all). Our financials are also reviewed to ensure economic stability. Lastly, we undergo a physical examination.

The social worker visited our home to complete a walk-through and check the overall safety of the environment (as a result we purchased fire escape ladders which I am quite frankly glad to have).

The toughest part is the paperwork. Included in it is a letter to the birth mother, family backgrounds and histories. Perhaps most daunting is the preference sheet. This is where you express your comfort (or discomfort) in having a child placed with you that has different psychological or physical disorders. Your preferences are specific to each disorder (we spent a lot of time on WebMD while completing this). You can also express ethnicity preferences as well as age and gender.

Once all this is done you are able to complete your on-line profile that is first reviewed by the Family Services staff and then is posted once your background checks are cleared.

All the background checks are renewed annually and an annual service fee is charged.

From this point you wait. This is the stage that we are at. Birth mothers can search your profile and even contact you with questions. They also fill out preference sheets which can then be matched with your own to determine compatibility (along with other profiles which also match).

Referrals are really key in the whole process. Because someone at Church knew that we were adopting we were put in contact with a wonderful woman who chose adoption for her unborn child. The decision was very difficult for her. She did it out of love for our mutual daughter and her name will forever be honored by our family. We love and respect her so much.

I want to have another child so badly. I sincerely hope that it is the Lord's will that another be placed with us.

Memorial Day

Well we have had a great day, and by we I mean Me, Bailey and Matthew. As per tradition the schedule went as follows:
Drive to Fallon a little later than planned
Visit Deceased relatives and mentally shop for gravestones
Eat Lunch none too soon because Jennifer forgot to eat breakfast
Visit Living relatives for longer than planned and look at all the dogs my Uncles dog kennel
Drive home with the sun in our eyes and try to stay awake luckily the one who managed it was the one driving.

We did mix it up a bit, Matthew got to go out with the boys this morning and fill his need for firearms. And a benefit to having a bit of land (as my parents have) is that people will let you borrow some pretty cool stuff if you will store it for them. Woot for Bailey and Daddy!
It was a great day. Thanks Grandma and Grandpa Anderson for taking us.

Paying our respects (as I taught Bailey to say it)


All the flags...they just make you grateful.

My sweet little girl. She helped cut the flowers from my parents house too.

I am so glad I came across this, and no I have no idea who it is.

Tuckered out Bailey.
Very much energized again Bailey. I don't even know whose that is.



My prize picture.

When You Think No One Is Looking

So the background is that Bailey offered to help vacuum while Jenn took care of some other chores. That was when Bailey discovered just how much fun the vacuum cleaner was to play with. Fortunately the vacuum was so loud that Bailey didn't see Jennifer going for the camera and she just played away. Notice her reaction as soon as she realizes that she is being watched.

Happy Birthday!

I guess that we were a little eager for our daughter to praise her new gift so we asked, "Do you like it?" To which she replied slowly and patiently, "You keep asking me if I like it and I like it." I guess our enthusiasm was a little excessive.

"Thank you for the new bike. It's SUPER big!"

Paradigm Shift

Bailey had her little mind blown tonight. She saw a man with earrings and immediately spoke up, "Boys don't have earrings". Feeling a little embarrassed we immediately tried to correct her saying that some do. I even showed her the holes in my ears from my old earrings. Jenn summarized by saying, "Daddy used to have earrings". We thought that we had cleared it all up and saved face with the guy at the table next to us until Bailey countered, "But, now he is a boy".

Practicum

This semester I have the opportunity to complete a practicum at a local middle school. Now there was a lot of drama surrounding my getting a placement which I shall not get into here, however, the placement finally came. I am working with an incredible social studies teacher at Dapoali Middle School in the Double Diamond area. His name is Fred Williams. He is prepared, he knows his class and I really enjoy the assignments that he puts together for them. He also takes me aside at different times to explain what he is doing with his class and why he is doing it. He really seems interested in helping me to become a good teacher and I really appreciate it. He has encouraged the students to talk to me about their assignments and to answer any questions that I might have. I spend a lot of the time asking them about what they are working on, and they have been really willing to let me look over their assignments. I am having a great time.

The practicum requires that I spend 30 hours total in the classroom. Most of that time is observation, however, I will have the opportunity to teach two lessons while I am there. I look forward to getting my assignments from Mr. Williams.

Disappointment

So let me say first of all that I think that our little snowman was adorable. Bailey really wanted to build one so Jenn helped her out and they put this little guy together all on their own. In seeing the finished product however Bailey was far from happy, "I wanted to make a BIG snowman" she said. This was followed by full on alligator tears. Well two days later it is still enough to make her cry, "I wanted to make a BIG snowman" she says in between sobs. It is simultaneously heart wrenching and annoying to have to see a two year old learn a lesson that we as adults know all to well, disappointment.

"If it wasn't for disappointment, I wouldn't have any appointments." -They Might Be Giants

Mary Had a Rockin Lamb

Little Abby

Bailey has an imaginary friend which I think is so cool. I don't believe that I ever really got into that (although my stuffed animals did serve as gunners in my Gundam type robot). Her name is "Little Abby" (Hmmm... I wonder where she came up with that). Little Abby fits in her hand and sleeps on our planter stand downstairs. She actually forgot her at preschool this last week and Jenn had to go back and get her. She also left her in the grocery cart when we went shopping but to save a return trip I invented the story that I saw Baby Abby in the cart and had picked her up and put her in my pocket. I then handed her back to her mommy. I believe in validating my child's play and all but gosh darn-it I was tired and not feeling up to another trip.



This one isn't centered because Bailey was running full speed giving Little Abby a piggyback ride.



Note her hands. She is holding Little Abby up on her shoulder